Congratulations Papal Accusers!

Now that you have accused the Vicar of Christ of formal heresy, you have the following new powers and privileges.

* You may stand in judgment over any other three Popes, to condemn them of heresy or apostasy, or to rename them.

* You no longer have to put change in parking meters.

* You may nullify any teaching of any other Pope or Ecumenical Council.

* Future Popes may not be elected without your consent.

* You may now take upon yourself by the following titles “Your Holiness”, “Supreme Judge of all the Faithful”, and “Grain of Sand on which the Church is Founded”.

* Bees will no longer sting you. Mosquitos, junk yard dogs, and great white sharks will no longer bite you.

* You can declare any idea to be heresy or dogma, without reason or theological argument.

* You can ban any two family members from Thanksgiving dinner, and any four from Fourth of July picnics.

* Future Ecumenical Councils may not teach anything without your consent.

* You may no longer receive holy Communion, as you are guilty of public formal schism, the public assertion of heresy, and causing grave scandal to the entire Church (see Canons 751, 1364, 915, 916, and 1373).

* You are very possibly not in the state of grace, as your sins are objectively very grave and may be beyond the ability of even fallen reason to be chosen with a good but mistaken conscience.

* You will be given extra suntan lotion and a room with a view in Hell.

* Tyre and Sidon shall be forgiven more than you, on the day of judgment.

* Future generations of Catholics will hold you to be ignorant of Catholic doctrine, devoid of charity even toward the Vicar of Christ, and filled with sinful pride.

— Ronald L. Conte Jr.

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